...on the faith issue. I've determined that I'm about as clueless as I ever have been and, at the moment, see no real hope on coming to any real conclusions on what my choice of belief is. With all the -isms that are out there, there's no way to really know what's the absolute bare truth which is why I use the phrase "choice of beliefs". Just pick something, anything - I don't even care what - and stick with it, could we?!
Am I struggling?
No... I think I'm giving up - at least for now.
At the moment my snow-globe of faith has hit the hard-wood floor. There's glass and water everywhere. No, you can't help me clean it up. Don't come in here; you'll most likely cut your own foot just by trying to get close to the mess.
I'll clean it up ...
eventually.
7 comments:
i noticed your quote from the ragamuffin gospel - rich mullins went to my "former" church and i got to sing with him a couple times (he played piano for me when i broke my thumb - very down to earth guy). anyway - all that to say, while your "cleaning up your globe" :) you might listen to some of his music - it's so honest with God and refreshing to the soul at the same time (i'm partial to his songs about kansas).
Well OVM,
Welcome to the fold. The disenfranchised. Been part of this group a while, and the thing that I wil tell you about them, they are a lot of fun.
When I stopped going to church about three years ago, I started studying on my own, from my own desire. I learned more in 6 months, than in 35 years in church. I am very happy. Just what you want to hear I am sure.
But anyway. Read almost all of your blog, one big theme hit me, "If we really are better than everyone else, why don't I feel it?" Your question I believe was, "If church is where you will get spiritual growth, why don't I see anyone getting better?" Let me throw one of my thoughts at you here http://myfaithdefined.blogspot.com/2007/01/works-because-of-faith.html
Church people wouldn't like, so what.
Anyway, an invitation I hand out quite often. Stop by my blog, check out the neighborhood and see if you like it. You are welcome there to engage or not as you like. Many different sides of conversation, and levels of knowledge. Feel free to come by anytime. Blogging is what I use for my study and church time now. Hope to hear from you. If not, that is fine too.
Chill: I didn't realize rich was a musician. I haven't looked much into his life work past that particular book. I'll check him out.
Nate: Thank you for the invitation. Up until a week ago, this blog has only been known by a few of my close friends. Since I've thrown it "out there" I have been so amazed at the blogosphere's comments. It's already been such an encouragement. I will jump over to your blog next.
i decided to bring the questions i would ask you over at 'deconstructed christian' here.
if you don't mind me asking, how long have you been on this 'road' now?
i know that ranting was a VERY important part of my early and middle and late deconstruction. the emotions needed a healthy outlet and i think 'the rant' can be one of them.
i also think the desire to see the 'evil' and the 'cruel joke' aspect of modern religion is a path some need to go down if we are to grow past the things those places can teach.
and i also understand the need to break from trying to figure it all out. you are not alone. we're out here. just a minority in our immediate worlds. thank god for a blogosphere for us to be able to find each other.
i do not mind the shards. if i get cut, it'll scar over and scars add mystique, so no big deal. :)
Jon,
This 'path' got started the weekend before Easter 2006. I'm sure it started in bits and pieces before that but that was at least the moment of walking away officially.
I'm still in the mode of just not wanting to put any effort in finding answers. At some point I'll need to reconstruct my statement of beliefs but I'm not sure when I'll have that kind of energy. I guess I'm still on the "eventually..." causeway.
I had a recent re-surge of anger toward the whole system which I'm still waiting to have the waves die down a bit. It's either that or launch off on the biggest rant known to mankind!
Whatever is profitable...right?
That would not be.
Hey OVM,
If you would like. I have a book, my inheritance from my grandfather, "What the scriptures say about salvation." My grandfather calls it a primmer. A good place to start. He was the part of the breakaway from church in, let's say the early 60's. He then started to interpret the bible without the filter of Doctrine. It just tells you what the bible says with a lot of Greek translated so it is understandable. I can get you a copy if you like. But it helped me alot.
Nate - who is the author of that book? I'll do a search of the state library system to see if I can pull it from there. I would be interested in reading it.
Post a Comment