The moment I held my first child in my arms, my heart shattered. I was proud and thankful, yes. Yet, all at once I saw flashes of the reality of what his life would bring; this life I created. I could hear his pre-teen voice asking, "Why do the kids pick on me?" I could see his teenage angst as he worked through the breakup of his first love. I could feel his emptiness as he would one day stand beside my grave.
I could not help but think, "What have I done?!"
In the face of that, I recognized fully the responsibility that parents bear to prepare children for what may come. It is imperative that young ones be taught the sanctuary of home, family, and friends; to live into the support systems available in order to be surrounded by those that will rejoice with successes as well as sit together through times of grief.
I used to watch the TV series, Sisters. Its tagline stuck with me: " The men in your life may leave you, children grow up, parents pass away. The only ones who are there for you, from cradle to grave, are your sisters." Altering that line, but maintaining the same sentiment, I remind my children often that regardless what changes life may bring, they will always have each other.
A lot has changed since that moment of holding my first of, what became, three babies. I often worry about their present states of mind as well as what ramifications may arise in their future. Watching them tonight brought a moment of relief from those concerns. At the end of a day full of sibling squabbles, they were piled up together -- enjoying each other and playing like good little cubs would do.
In the end, they will have each other. No one outside of them will contain the memories and experiences that they will have between them. A special little club has formed that can sustain them through anything that may come about. Being in that moment brought relief to recognize that while they each will venture out on their own, ultimately they will never have to stand alone.
7 comments:
For as much as they fight, they will also fight to protect one another too.
That's heavy, Michelle. I have three siblings, and as our parents age, I think that exact same thing all the time.
Sometimes I wish my boys had more siblings, but they do have cousins they are close to. I can only hope they remain close as the years go by.
I hope your kids are adapting to the changes in their lives. Love to you all.
Nate -
That's comforting. I do hope so.
Erin,
I have one sibling and we haven't
been close for a long time but even in that, if either of us really needed each other, of course we'd drop it all and come through.
My little ones are doing really well - or so it seems. Can you ever really know and not worry? ;-)
They've learned a great deal lately that every situation has some bad AND good; to appreciate the good and let the bad roll on by. I'm quite proud of them.
Very deep and profound. And you are so right; they will always have each other. :)
Your post touched me so much. I lost my 1 and only sibling, my older brother Michael at the age of 23. I miss him so much and dream of the relationship we had and what would have been. I am now the mother of 2 boys (2 years apart) and love watching them grow together. Thank you for your words and the reminder of how strong sibling bonds can be.
Becky
I'm so sorry, Becky, to hear of your loss. It warms my heart to watch mine tumble and grow together. I'm thankful that you, also, can even further appreciate what you see in your children from your own sense of loss.
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